Strategies To Confront and Conquer Goal Shame

Have you achieved your Goals? Just sit with this statement for a moment and see what comes up! Possible thoughts could be, I haven’t achieved my goal and I am inadequate and unworthy of the goals I’ve set. Or, I am afraid to share my goals for fear of judgment. It’s important to understand your thought process: you may have goal shame lurking in the shadows of your mind! Shame is a messenger and it’s important to pay attention to the message and take action to live a more meaningful life. If shame is a brake to your success, address it, ensure you are running on full power and then, anything becomes possible!

Build Resilience against Shame

In April 2020 Joaquin Selva wrote an article “Shame Resilience Theory” which indicated that at some points in our lives, we will all feel shame. Since there is no way to avoid feeling shame and it can have severe negative consequences, it’s important to consider how we react to shame. Shame Resilience Theory is an attempt to define shame and its consequences, as well as the ways that people respond to shame. If you practice the steps suggested, you will become more resilient in the face of shame and more powerful.

Achieve the Impossible Dream

Now that you have a tough leadership mindset, it’s time to achieve that impossible dream!

Sir Edmund Hillary indicated in the early 1940s that he was going to climb Everest and shared a seemingly impossible goal with the world. No one had achieved this and against public criticism, he succeeded on May 29, 1953 with Tenzing Norgay. Hillary didn’t play small!

“Many of the things that seem impossible now will become realities of tomorrow.” Walt Disney

Define what Success means for you

My blog, Set Yourself up for Success” indicates how to think about success differently. We all have a different definition of the word and success can be anything you want it to be as long as you’re ultimately happy and content with your life.

My definition of success means significantly impacting others’ lives and making a difference. And, it’s the pursuit of your own planned goals and desires that propels you toward success? One characteristic that drives these people’s success (whether they’re successful in politics, business, sports, arts, science, athletics, etc.) is that they’re insanely goal-driven. I believe goals are fundamental to success.

Based on my experience, steps to achieve the Impossible Dream are:

  • Clarify your purpose, decide on and own your goals
  • Be clear about expectations
  • Stay focused and regularly check in with your team
  • Stop Being Your Own Worst Critic, or listening to others
  • Measure the gains “Success Breeds Success”
  • Engage a coach
  • Stop Playing Small
  • Be relentless in the pursuit of your success

Leadership isn’t easy and sometimes we need help. I am always here.

Get in touch today to learn more about achieving your Impossible Dream and set yourself up for success!

Stay Kind. Stay Courageous.

Sonia x

About The Author Sonia McDonald And LeadershipHQ

Sonia McDonald is the CEO and founder of LeadershipHQ and McDonald Inc. Sonia is a in demand keynote speaker, leadership coach and advisor, author and facilitator.

She believes we should lead with kindness and courage, from the heart, doing rather than telling and is known for her mantra ‘just lead’. She leads by example in all these areas and through her one on one practical coaching, leadership training for teams and organisations encourages others to do the same. Sonia has helped hundreds of people on their leadership journey to become the best version of themselves and in turn, inspire and bring out the best in others. Also she and her team have worked and partnered with a number of businesses and companies for over a decade build great leadership teams and cultures.

For more than 25 years, Sonia has been on the front lines of Human Resources, Leadership and People and Culture. She has held leadership positions worldwide and through experience, research and study come to realise what it takes to be a truly great leader.

Sonia has an ability to speak bravely and authentically about her own development as a leader, personal and career challenges in a way which resonates with her audience. She is recognised as a LinkedIn influencer and has become an in-demand keynote speaker, starts important conversations.

She is an award-winning published author of Leadership Attitude and Just Rock It! and writes regularly for publications such as The Australian, HRD Magazine, Smart Healthy Women and Women’s Business Media. Sonia has become recognised for her commentary around the topic of leadership, championing the up and coming leaders of tomorrow, advocating for women in business as well as building leaders in small business.

Keynote Topics for 2020

Sonia will give you peace of mind when booking a speaker. She is a proven world-class professional speaker with the skills to “rock an audience”. Her energy, empathy, kindness, sensitivity, and humour will enhance any event she appears.

1.       Leadership Attitude

2.       Just Rock It

3.       First Comes Courage

4.       Courage is Impact

5.       Courage is Purpose

6.       Courage is Resilience

7.       Courage is Kindness

Phone 1300 719 665



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About LeadershipHQ

Outstanding Leadership Starts With You.

The key to success today is Great Leadership. Your leaders lead your culture and it’s the culture which drives your strategy.

We partner with organisations and businesses to grow great, kind and courageous leaders through bespoke leadership development programs and individual and group coaching – face-to-face and online.

We also celebrate and showcase great leadership through our Outstanding Leadership Awards and the Just Lead Podcast.

If you are a great leader or organisation, who wants to be even greater, we’d love to work with you.

Great Leadership begins with us.